Remembering a friend

Today marks a year since my friend, Christy, passed away at too young an age.

I'm thinking of her today and her beautiful family who misses her so much.

Tonight, a candle will burn brightly in her honor, just as her memory burns brightly in my heart and in the hearts of so many others.

Confessions of a shitty blogger

Yeah, that would be me.

I'm embarrassed, to say the least, that I haven't been blogging with any regularity in the last few months. I try to - I do - but I either have severe writers' block and freeze the instant my fingers rest on the keyboard ... or I just can't bring myself to write about the things bouncing around in my head.

And, I wish I could use the excuse of, "I'm busy with a new baby and my life is nothing but bliss," but that's not really it, either. I wish that were the reason, rather than the actual one: that I'm going through a very rough patch. Again.

I'm sure many people would think that life must be grand for me now that Megan's here, but the contrary is what's true. I finally have the beautiful little girl I've dreamed of and longed for, and I'm not happy. Leave it to me to spoil even the purest of things in life.

I miss Ryan like I never have before. My heart hurts so much, and I really don't believe that time is capable of healing all wounds. Some just cut too deep to ever fully heal, and all it takes is one little scratch for the pain to start all over again.

Will it ever end? Will I ever have peace?