The bitch is back

Since Ryan's birth, I've wondered how long it would take for my dear "Aunt Flo" to find me. I was concerned that between the stress of Ryan's death and the physical stress of the C-section, dear ole Auntie might have lost her way.

Turns out she and her little dog, Spot, were missing me a LOT since last October's visit and kept a pretty good set of directions back to my place.

Don't I feel like the lucky one?

Okay, yes, I do feel fortunate that my body seems to be recovering and jumping back in the saddle physically. But, I'm also pissed that the Bitch is rushing me along, giving me a not-so-gentle push back into my life. Admittedly, it was damn nice having that reprieve for nearly ten months!

I just don't know how to feel about this. I feel badly because, despite how much I emotionally lag behind in rejoining life, my physical self seems ready to march forward, with or without my emotional state intact. I feel somewhat betrayed, since my emotional self is no where near normal, so how can any other part of me be ready to move along? But, when the rational part of me kicks in, I know that deep down this a good sign that my 36-year-old body hasn't quit yet, leaving the door open to possibly (and hopefully!) expanding my family of three.

This certainly explains the uncontrollable cravings for chocolate I've been having the last few days!