The "club" grows ...

This morning I overheard my co-workers talking about a local radio personality who had been eagerly awaiting the arrival of his second daughter.

But, then, my colleagues' conversation took the turn I never expected it to take: the parents had lost their baby girl.

This news rocked me to the core. I don't know these parents personally, but the father is part of an afternoon radio show that I faithfully tune in to every afternoon while making my way home. He and his wife were expecting at the same time as Mike and I were in 2005, and then coincidentally, again this year. I enjoy hearing this DJ's stories of his three-year-old daughter, as it always give me a reference point to dream about what Ryan would've been doing if he had lived. And, along with many other devoted listeners, I was on pins and needles while awaiting the latest update on the baby's arrival. I just wasn't prepared to hear this outcome, even though I personally know it does happen.

When I hear news like this, it's hard not to remember all the raw emotion that I felt when Ryan died. Those first few days afterwards are nightmarish. Denial, fear and panic rush in and out of your mind at record speed, all while trying to make sense out of something that makes no sense. It feels as though you're moving in slow motion, while the world around you whizzes by, oblivious to your loss and confusion. You wonder if you'll collapse from the burden of the now-heavy heart you carry.

They are beginning a journey that no one should ever have to take, and I wish I could do anything to ease their pain.

Please, keep them close in thought and prayer as they make their way down this difficult path.

May God bless you and keep you, angel Grayson.